Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson's dead.

He died of a cardiac arrest.

I guess his heart couldn't beat it.

A tribute to the late Michael Jackson, the king of pop who revolutionize music, a suspected pedophile and for his contributions to the science of plastic surgery.

Jokes aside, nobody has reached his level as a performer, he was truly one of a kind.

A conversation about love

Below is a conversation I just had with a female friend on MSN. I'm posting it because it is interesting and might make you think, and it shows me in good light, and I am too lazy to write a real post. All names have been changed.

Leland says:
lol
u like transformers

girl (space) friend says:
uh huh
u?

Leland says:
din watch yet
im guessing nice action

girl (space) friend says:
YEAP!
watched w ASD
hahahaha

Leland says:
i can see now y its so kewl
girl (space) friend says:
so random
no no no

Leland says:
i get it la
just a jab
lol
how tings

girl (space) friend says:
im objectively saying thats its kewl!
i hate d 1st one
bt story-wise it suck
jz love d special effects

Leland says:
its transformers
the story
is of course like that

girl (space) friend says:
uh huh
so leland
what do u think of pre-marital sex?

Leland says:
er
cool
its
cool

girl (space) friend says:
right...
i can see d roll of ur eyes

Leland says:
i tink ppl should have more premarital sex

girl (space) friend says:
u dont wanna a virgin bridew?

Leland says:
not really

girl (space) friend says:
seriously?
y?

Leland says:
y should i
besides
a girl with experience
probably knows more stuff

girl (space) friend says:
shouldnt she b pure?

Leland says:
that can make me feel more awesome

girl (space) friend says:
dnt u wanna b d first to touch her?

Leland says:
pure?
well..
a bit, but practical considerations far outweigh that
come on a girl having premarital sex that i would go for..
u know
more fun in bed
i dun wanna marry some girl
that got brought up like a traditional stupid girl
then later cant enjoy sex
sex is great!
how can u accept that more pure crap nyways
unless u follow ur gut..
sluts= more chance of having someone elses baby
madonna-whore dichonomy
evo psy

girl (space) friend says:
haha!
bt.. d thought of another guy who had her b4
doesnt bother you?

Leland says:
well not really
unless i know the guy
that it would bother me
a biot

girl (space) friend says:
y then?

Leland says:
well its just kinda not nice imagining the girl u like having sex with another
but another then that im cool
she probbaly can give a 10x better blowjob then any virgin

girl (space) friend says:
well..
blowjobs does not break d hymen
duh
any virgin can gv an awesome fellatio

Leland says:
girl
u know nothing

girl (space) friend says:
yea
fine
so i admit i do not
educate me then

Leland says:
and enough about that overrated piece of skin
not oni blowjobs u know
a sexually confident girl
one that can enjoy sex
knows what she wants
knows how important sex is to a man
knows when to give and take if it comes to sex
imagine a girl that think of sex as a chore
that'd be horrible

girl (space) friend says:
haha
i always like hw you rationalize things

Leland says:
its about wat i want in a partner

girl (space) friend says:
bt still..
its because guys do not have a definitive indication of them losing their virginity..
bt girls do..
that makes it all d more harder

Leland says:
some guys care bout it
its not cause of that
if parents knew their son were having sex
they may even feel proud
if its their daughter..

girl (space) friend says:
exactly
why then?
bcz of d cultural perception that girls should b presented as gifts?

Leland says:
isnt it obvious

girl (space) friend says:
to their partners on their marriage nights?
i kinda figured its down to that

Leland says:
,remember
its most reproductively succesful for a guy to have as many sex as he gets
its most reproductively succesful for a woman to pick a guy with good genes and a decent level of commitment
make sense now?

girl (space) friend says:
yea yea yea
bt seriously.
you saying that you dont mind that another guy had touched her jz bothers me
me n ASD were discussing yesterday
i went "you wanna fuck me, right?"

Leland says:
ASD 120% cant accept

girl (space) friend says:
he's like.. "yea, im a guy. bt then, i wanna you to remain pure for your husband n crap"
duh
so i went "hmmm.. we'll c"

Leland says:
well
ultimately its a decision for urself
just remember that there are people that will always prejudice against non-virgins
hypocrites mostly
at the very least though make sure the guy is special for the first time

girl (space) friend says:
*haihz.
sex should b jz bout hedonistic pleasure
there shouldnt b anything more than that

Leland says:
sex has always been about making babies

girl (space) friend says:
yea
bt since d introducation of condoms n pills
d role has slightly reduced..

Leland says:
haha
well
evolution cant foresee things

girl (space) friend says:
it went towards pleasure instead

Leland says:
pleasure
is a side effect
for people to want to have sex
so they can have babies

girl (space) friend says:
uh huh
hmm.
mayb my decision will b made in d heat of d moment
we'll c..
nwayz. yea. told ya i'll get him back
i did, didnt i?
haha. im pathetic

Leland says:
congratulations
i struggle
to maintain a straight face

girl (space) friend says:
hahaha!
i noe!\
im laughing out loud over here too
im bored la.
nothing to do much in these 2 months
having a bf jz spices things up

Leland says:
if u say so
girl (space) friend.. says:
you finshed your webpage d?

Leland says:
no
havent started
a fren helping me tmr
study computer

girl (space) friend says:
haha!
no gf this week
?

Leland says:
got cos after friday im semi-free

girl (space) friend says:
haha.. so sweet..
do you still lust for her
jz bcz she's 'available
'
or bcz shes her?

Leland says:
lust?
because she's a girl and shes hot

girl (space) friend.. says:
yea. bt if another comes along

Leland says:
but i relaly do love her

girl (space) friend says:
hawter than her
n willing to have you?
awwwww... seriously? i kinda junk d idea of love d
dont believe in it

Leland says:
aww
did i ruin it for u

girl (space) friend says:
no no no..
more towards like. boy meets girl.
passion fires.
then.. its d commitment that comes in..
after awhile familiarity tells him that he cant live without her..

Leland says:
o ASD ruined i for u

girl (space) friend says:
n thus, he does everything to keep her
n marriage calls..
n he's jz too lazy to leave her

Leland says:
hahaha

girl (space) friend says:
nah. ASD didnt ruin it for me. ASD opened my eyes to it

Leland says:
differnt words
same meaning
besides
there are so many diff ppl

girl (space) friend says:
i mean. yea, ive been in love. its d longing, d missing, d yearning.
bt i dont think you "love' d person.

Leland says:
maybe love is just working with someone u really like to spend the rest of ur life with

girl (space) friend says:
you love how you feel around d person
yea. bt its bcz you love yourself more than you love d person..
bt then.. when you feel that you cant live without d person.
you rather sacrifice your life for him/her
thus.. a word: LOVE

Leland says:
must one be that self-sacrificial to be called LOVE?

girl (space) friend says:
well.. you jz said. you wanna spend your entire life w him/her

Leland says:
thats a rather cynical view
think bout it
is it that love isnt real
or was it ur expectations of it that were unrealistic
and naive

girl (space) friend says:
nah. i dont have much expectations of it

Leland says:
right
i believe u

girl (space) friend says:
what im trying to say is that.. 'love' itself.. could b substituted w so many other words
commitment.. infatuation.. comfortability.. familiarity.. happiness
bt ppl jz lump it all into one big fat word called love

Leland says:
it cant be substituted
it means all of that

girl (space) friend says:
it ca n
you think you love your family?

Leland says:
it can but u wouldnt be telling hte whole picture

girl (space) friend.. says:
you dont.. if not for d things they have done to you
if your mother wasnt who she was.. if she didnt carry you for 9 months.. would you had loved her?
or at times when you got into fights w her.. n hated her
you still love her?
bt yea.. you convinced your self you do..

Leland says:
u're broadening the meaning of love to mean ridicolously unconditioning feelings of affection and willingness to sacrifice

girl (space) friend says:
cz you think of all d good memories
well. you just said you wanna spend your ENTIRE lifetime w d person you love
dont start calling me hypocritic

Leland says:
im not calling u hypocritic
im just pointing something out

girl (space) friend says:
so, love.. it jz comes n goes?
exactly. why. i. said. love. does. not. exist.

Leland says:
the word
has so many meanings
its not neccesary that u need to be like wat u said to mean being in love
i can tell u from the bottom of my heart
i really do love my gf

girl (space) friend says:
ah..
well.
someone told me..
love is loving d person.. even when you put her last
some other guy that i emo-ed to la

Leland says:
that sentence doesnt even begin to make sense

girl (space) friend says:
bt it makes sense.. right?

Leland says:
who else would i wake at 6 in the monring, drive over to bring her here, then drive her back at night?

girl (space) friend says:
all i c are jz your fox-dogs
its bcz you enjoy her company

Leland says:
true
but does me enjoying her company

girl (space) friend says:
love then.. in this case. is enjoyment

Leland says:
means i dont love her?
it isnt
enjoyment

girl (space) friend says:
it means you enjoy her company

Leland says:
is part of love
but love isnt enjoyment

girl (space) friend says:
it does not necessitate loving her

Leland says:
if u define love so stringent that nobody can pull it off
that of course it doesnt exist
and the word would mean nothing
but then words are made by people
and people use the word for all sorts of things
if it din have meaning it wouldnt have any practical usage
is ur redefinition of the word love accurate?
if i tell u that altruistic behavior ultimately stems from the gene that cares for itself, does that mean that an altruistic being isnt altruistic?
if im willing to sacrifice something very important for a friedn, becasue i enjoy his/her company and i have grown attached to the person, does it mean i dont love her?

girl (space) friend says:
alright. so, say for example.
you sacrificed lots of time for me.
listening to me whine bout ASD.
bringing me to mcD n spending time w me
so that i get over ASD
that meant you love me
aite?
i know. bt your love to me is jz as that of a friend
your love to her.. goes way deeper
bt c leland
im playing your game
im trying to tell you.. that 'love
'love' is jz another meaning that humans attach to emotions generated by our hormones..

Leland says:
dear im familiar with wat u're saying

girl (space) friend says:
that generally mean nothing at all
other than to lead to sex
n reproduction

Leland says:
it doesnt mean nothing
zz

girl (space) friend says:
argh

Leland says:
just becasue somehting stems from another thing doesnt mean it is the other thing

girl (space) friend says:
double negatives
i dont understand double negative sentences

Leland says:
u should know my worldview by now
wat u're saying is
love isnt as special as u thought it was
well
nothing is
as mythically speical

girl (space) friend says:
yea, i guess.

Leland says:
supernaturally
bla bla bla

girl (space) friend says:
im saying that love isnt as special as i thought it was

Leland says:
but it doesnt mean what we experience is any less

girl (space) friend says:
bcz its d amalgamation of so many things..
i noe..

Leland says:
neither does it mean it has no meaning

The Secret

Ever heard of the book that's seemingly all the rage lately titled The Secret?
I myself am surprised how well-known it is. Even my friends who don't really read that much know a whole lot about it.

I hate that.

The book is apparently a self-help book. While I don't have a problem with self-help books generally, (people sometimes need a motivational boost and some good advice) it's books that all full of nonsense like the secret that annoys the fuck out of me.

The whole basis of the book is like this: Apparently, the whole secret that is so hyped up is the law of attraction. What is this law of attraction, you ask? Well it essentially works like this: you know how you want something really really really bad? Like that girl(or boy) you've been crushing on for months? Or that new iPhone that you can't afford? Or maybe a million dollars? Well, if you want it that badly, simple. Ask for it! Who to ask from? Well, the Universe of course! Because you know, every whim and desire of yours is so important that the ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSE just has to give a crap enough to give you what you want. Because you know, you're just that fucking special.

Pardon the language, but stuff like this really really gets to me. Of course, books like this sell because of their enormous psychological appeal and their very convincing (although complete bullshit) points. Imagine of course, if you confront someone who believes in this crap and ask them: Hey, I've been asking the universe and believing that that girl will give a shit for months but nothing seems to be happening. The answer? You don't believe HARD enough. The unfalsifiability of the claim is what makes it so convincing to so many. If it sounds convincing to you, then consider this. There is now a invisible pink unicorn behind you watching you read this blog. It's invisible and intangible. Prove me wrong.

Why am I so bothered when people use misinformation and mislead people with false beliefs? Probably because I value truth more then most people. But it's also because people that write crap like that are, in fact, taking hard-earned cash from people who can't know any better. Imagine if I sell sugar lumps to a tribe of people who has never seen it, tell them it gives them magical properties and sell the lumps to them for an absurb amount of gold. Yes, people like that are indeed con artists, only instead of selling fake jewelry or magical pendants that increase your health as long as you're wearing it, they are selling false hopes and beliefs.



Well, at least The Chasers got it right.

Battle of the Sexes 2

After looking at the guys, it's time to look at the girls. We've seen why guess are horny most of the time, the question is, why aren't girls? Why do girls need to feel a "connection" or emotional feelings before they can think about sex with a guys? Why do girls play "hard to get"? And why do girls frequently are the ones more crazy about the relationship after a while?

First off, we must remember, whilst a guys can quite literally impregnate half the world with his sperm cells, a girl can only has a limited number of eggs in a lifetime. Not only that, if impregnated, a girl would have to be "unavailable" for 9 months. FURTHERMORE, even after the baby's born, it's generally the female who has the maternal instinct to take care off (since the truth is, a guy really has no way of knowing for sure if the baby is theirs.

Translated, this means that while the most successful male strategy is to fuck as many as possible, for females, it's a tad more complicated then that.
1. They need to make sure the guy that so generously donated his sperm has good genes.
For males, it really doesn't matter if his sperm ends up with poor genes, because a single sperm (or a single fuck) costs so little to him. For females however, a pregnancy has a much much higher cost, meaning, that she has got to make sure the genes she get are of a good quality, if not, she'd be spending a lot of resources and time rearing a reproductive failure.
2. They need to be sure the male is willing to commit to them and their baby.
Humans, unlike other primates, are a high male parental investment species. This means our males actually give a shit for their kids. Chimpanzee mothers take care of their babies alone, male bears and lions might actually kill a females cub, which would (strange to us) immediately make the female, (the mother of the slain cubs) be receptive to sex. This means that aside from good genes, females want males that commit and are willing to provide resources, time and care for their offspring.

A combination of the above 2 factors can easily make us understand a lot of things about females. For example, why do they like it when guys do seemingly irrational romantic crap (it signifies commitment), why do they value emotional connections (again commitment), and why are they sexually aroused not by the appearance of a guy, but by his gentle whisperings and soft touch. (Signs of emotional attachment = signs of commitment).

As for why girls generally get more into the relationship the further it goes, it's because before the male and female have a relationship (sexual), the female holds the cards. She's the one having the scarce resource (the egg). Sperm cells are frequently harvested by males everyday, whether or not in the presence of females. Thus, she plays it hard, she demands shows of affection and commitment before copulation. After the relationship begins, however, the male holds the power in the relationship. The female is essentially stuck with this male, at least for the next 9 months. The female cannot find other mates while she's pregnant, and no guy would want to rear another guy's kids. The male on the other hand, can effectively have sex with as many other woman he wants, if given the opportunity. This also explains why females are generally less promiscuous then males.

Therefore, expectantly, we will see the male having urges to fuck other woman, and the women trying to stop men from doing it (and thus diverting his resources to the other woman). If you think it's because of more then this, then bear this in mind. In almost all societies, rich powerful men have tons of wives and kids, with none of the wives unwilling. This is of course, because the said male is resourceful enough to provide for all his mates.

Battle of the Sexes 1

Ah.. love.. The euphoric feelings of happiness one feels, when that guy or that girl turned around and just give you that look.. the comfort you feel as your loved one lies on your lap (or vice versa), and you gently stroke her (or his) head.. the rush of feelings you get as you look at the special one..
all going to be systematically broken down and analyzed by a the bastard known as Leland :3

Have you ever noticed how most typical (note the word typical) relationship goes? First, it's usually the guy that goes after the girl. We've all seen guys go crazy over some girl, then go ahead and do whatever it takes to get them. After that, the girl would either accept or reject the guy's advances. If she rejects, the guy might persist for a long or short time, then after some emo-ing give up or switches target. If she accepts, the girl would find herself starting to fall head over heels for the guy, and begin to get more and more attached to the relationship. Ironically at this point the guy's feelings is likely to fade less and less, usually the guy won't be as crazy about the girl as he was when he was after her.

Strange isn't it? Wouldn't it make more sense if the guy and girl fall head over heels for each other at the same time? Sure there is a period, the start of the relationship, where both parties are so intoxicated with hormones they can barely function as human beings, but before and after, the guy and girl both seem to be having feelings very much not synchronized with each others.

Truthfully, it might make things simpler, but it wouldn't make more sense. To answer the question, we have to go back millions of years ago, in the environment where our species evolved.
First, we look from a male's point of view. We all know men are much more easily aroused then women. We also know that men get aroused through visual means, and can get sexually aroused by any women that isn't hideous. This is easy to explain. Guys can easily ejaculate millions of sperm cells, and the easiest way to ensure your genes get pass on to the next generation is.. you got it, fuck as many women as possible.

Yet you might ask, why does guys go crazy over 1 particular girl, and would go to extreme lengths just to be with her? Wouldn't it make sense to go after as many girls as possible? It would, if the girls will have you. Remember, there are other competing and females usually won't put out so easily (for reasons we will go into later). So, if a guy goes after as many girls as possible, and spread his resources/effort among them, it's likely that no females will accept him, and rather accept another male that would commit, thus it makes more sense to go crazy over a particular girl and commit to her every resource available. Of course, while you're going after Girl A, and Girl B comes along and spreads her legs for you, it doesn't make sense for you to refuse. I'm sure most guys know (and admit at least to themselves) that, however, being completely commit ed to one girl (at least for a while) is the most reproductively successful strategy, and thus the genes for mentioned behavior spreads.

The way these genes work, of course, is by dosing you with pleasure hormones every time you see that girl, which will make you think about her all day.. do anything for her.. etc etc.

Next part: Why are girls coy? Stay tuned!

In the night

He tossed and he turned. Nothing changed. He told himself it's all right. It has always been this way. Nothing changed. He closed his eyes again. This shouldn't be bothering you. I need to sleep. My realizations mean nothing. Nothing changed. He thought to himself.

Me, tossing and turning here. It's ironic. It's the same as everything else. He smiled. It wasn't filled with happiness. Or joy. It was just a tiny bit of satisfaction, the kind one gets when filled with a sense of superiority. In this case, or in any other case he realized, undeserving. Which made him smiled another strange smile.

Meaningless. This is meaningless. He turned and tossed on his bed, feeling the horrible throb in his head, caused by his thoughts, prodding him awake every time he drifts closer to slumber. Then he thought of people. His best friends, how oblivious they are. Worrying about girls/guys.. grades.. peers.. As if anyone can understand. No. Humans aren't made to make pointless realizations. He knew he was no better, and he suffers from what they worry about as much as they do.

None of them probably lay awake in bed, head throbbing, uncomfortable, and disturbed for no real reason though.

Reality

Have you ever experienced something that you can't quite remember, remember incorrectly, or what you felt did not correspond with what actually happened? For example, you might think you placed your keys on your table, and after you can't it, rethink back, and you were absolutely sure you couldn't had left it anywhere else, when suddenly your brother/sister/mother/friend pops out of nowhere and says they found it in your bag? Or maybe once when you hear a knock on the door, yet when you go check it, nobody's there. I'm sure everyone has experienced something like this at one point or another. When you think about it, our perceptions and senses are not always that reliable. Optical illusions are a stark reminder of the limitations of our perceptions.


AHHHHH!

So what right? Sometimes we get a few things wrong here and there, no big deal right? Well, that's until you realize that when we make such "mistakes" in our perceptions, we have no way of knowing until after the event, in which the "truth" is affirmed to us through again, our perceptions. In other words, we can only affirm our perceptions through other perceptions. Or, another way of saying that is, we have no way of knowing, at any time, whether our perceptions are true or not. Fuuu-

The Al-Salam Shark

In the little town of Nilai, near KLIA,
near INTI-UC, where students study and play,
is a little mamak shop, called Al-Salam,
which is a popular hangout, from pagi to malam.

In this little shop lives a creature,
Who's appearance and attributes do not normally feature,
Indeed, he is the Al-Salam shark,
and to many people, his situation seems stark.



Does he ever get bored? Many ponder,
For he keeps swimming around, in that glass cylinder.
Never stopping, never resting, just constantly swimming,
For if he stops moving, he stops breathing.

An interesting curiosity he has become,
undoubtly a smart plan to increase Al-Salam's income.
Humans look and feel pity towards him,
but most don't know he does more then swim.

In truth our dear shark has a name, and it's Bob,
and truly, even if he could, he wouldn't sob.
Most people don't realize, as they are observing,
that Bob is returning the favour, to what they're doing.

He watches as they eat, chat and laugh,
and how they interact with each other, often acting tough.
He noticed their envy, happiness, and disappointments,
and how they control their actions and judgments.

He observed that as a matter of fact,
that many uses him, as the beginning of an act,
to begin a conversation, to be closer to their friends,
for example to apologize, to make amends.


Rawr.

He watches as many times, in a group of freshmen,
A guy, desperately seeking attention,
from an often indifferent girl, who doesn't give a shit,
and Bob knew, that it was too much for the guy to admit.

He watches, as people get together,
how often they seek, to get the better of each other.
How when they appear to be helpful and sweet,
when in truth, they intentions are never that neat.

He noticed how easily they are affected,
by the actions of others, even though they try to be grounded.
He realized that what they feel of the thing the called control,
is merely an illusion, as empty as a hole.

Then Bob smiled. (or did the shark equivalent),
as he swam around again, and realized in an instant,
that those who pity him, are on the point of idiocy,
For in truth, they are not much more free then he.

:)

Crossing the Bridge

If you're an INTI student, you'd know that in order to go to class, many times we have to cross a sky bridge, linking the academic block to the multi-purpose hall. Today, as I happily skipped to class, I stumbled upon these er, paper signs that some society probably put up. Putting up signs like this is an interesting way, because as you cross the bridge, you read the other signs, one after another.

Seems interesting, INTI recently changed owners, for those that don't know. Maybe they're promoting something cool that the new management allowed?


Hmm.. Seems interesting. Maybe we get some new facilities! Or maybe it's just one of those love your college crap. Either way, I'll see how it goes.


Err. Okay. I knew that, but what could this lead to?


Actually I knew that as well. But most people might not, is this some wildlife conservation or ecology thing?


OH SHIT. I sincerely hope this is not what I think it is about..
Then i saw it.. Inti Muslim Student Society. Crap.


Not the design argument again.. Btw, snail sex must be pretty interesting. (And I don't mean sex as in gender)


I don't get how this proves their god either.


AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...


If you're searching for relavance, you won't find any.


Must be some kind of sick divine practical joke. It's actually quite funny when you think about it.


Darwin and Wallace are turning in their graves... sobbing.


I can't resist posting the next picture after this.



and finally..


WHY THANK YOU, Inti Muslim Society, this is what you done to my mind:


Truth is, how cool things are, and how cool life is doesn't prove the existence your God, nor His magnificence and greatness, nor His purpose for mankind. Using a student's role in INTI as an analogy to God's role for mankind is neither creative, nor smart, nor accurate. Humans are not "human inventions" that exist for a particular purpose. Suggesting that joining the event, or your religion, makes a student "stay smart", thus implying that students who do not do so are stupid, does not make your cause seem pure, in fact, it's a cheap shot. Not different from many marketing campaigns I might add.

Next time, you guys wanna promote your society or your event, do what the INTI Christian Fellowship is doing. Invite some musician nobody knows, make it seem like a big deal and grant free access to students for his concert.

I concur.